I keep trying to start this blog post in my head and I get two sentences in and give up. I think it is because in addition to the information that I want to share there are a lot of emotions and feelings that I am still working through. Part of me just wants to say "Hey, I need another surgery" and not talk about anything about the situation but the other part of me feels like I have all of this stuff that I need to get off of my chest. I'll try not to be over dramatic but you have been warned!
The rambling begins now...
I try to be pretty transparent here on the blog because that is just how I am in real life. When you have gone through multiple bowel obstructions and surgeries you sort of lose your filter on what is appropriate to talk about :).
A little backstory.... I haven't really brought this up to many people, but we have been trying to have another baby since around December. We didn't have to try at all to get pregnant with Kenley or Claire so this (almost) year of trying has been really challenging for us. I can totally see where God has used it to draw out so much sin in my life for me to deal with. It has been and is a sanctifying process.
We knew that with my complications during Claire's pregnancy that there could be problems with conceiving in the future but typically to be seen by a fertility specialist you have to be trying for a year. Thankfully because of my history, I was allowed to be seen a little sooner since who knows what kind of weird things could be going on in my insides at any given time. A little over a month ago I had my first appointment with my fertility specialist who did an ultrasound and found 3 large cysts on my right ovary. My doctor prescribed me birth control because sometimes the hormones from the birth control can shrink cysts. I was shocked when I left the appointment. Who goes to a fertility doctor and gets prescribed birth control? This girl of course!
This past Friday, I had my follow-up appointment to check on the cysts. Unfortunately the news I received was that my cysts have grown considerably and have taken over and completely damaged my right ovary and my right fallopian tube. Almost immediately when the ultrasound started, my doctor said "you need to have surgery". In my mind I was thinking.... I *just* had tonsil surgery! I still feel like crap! I don't want to have to recover from another surgery!
I will get a phone call this week to schedule the surgery. It seemed to me like they wanted it to be soon. It will be done through my Kenley c-section scar so I am basically looking at a c-section recovery minus the baby. They will also do a biopsy on everything that they remove to hopefully rule out cancer and other scary stuff. Though it is most likely just due to my crazy scar tissue forming body.
The good news is that my left ovary and left fallopian tube look good right now. The hope is that once all of the damaged stuff is gone then my left side will work like a champ and our chances of pregnancy will be increased because the left side will be the one that ovulates every time. I know that I have had crazy pregnancy medical stuff and people have voiced their opinion to me that we should just be done because my body can't take it. I really feel like God has another biological child for us. A future pregnancy will probably not be easy on me, I understand that. My pregnancy with Claire certainly wasn't easy but she was worth it! We have wanted a big family for so long and I don't feel like God gave us that desire in vain. {We are also still very much planning to pursue adoption as soon as we can as well.}
So that is about it for the update on my life :) I will update with the surgery date and more details as soon as I know more!
5 months ago
11 comments:
Keri,
I am so glad you shared. Your transparency is a beautiful thing.
How can I come along side you and help?...I'd love to bring a meal to you after the surgery!!
Keri what a awesome an powerful post. I would say that fertility can be an issue in our eyes but the Lord brings all that is needed together in his timing. May each day bring peace and comfort to know the Lord is in control.
Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. Proverbs 19:21
I am so sorry, friend! I will be praying for you!
Praying!
I am feeling very teary (it might have something to do with watching the presidential debate though) after reading your post. Thank you so much for bearing yourself. I will be praying for you and clinging to the truth that God is good! xoxo
Vicki was just asking about you today! We NEED to get together soon!
know that we are praying for God's perfect will in all of this. We praise God for friends like yall that are placing your trust in Him!
We will pray for you too.
We'll be praying for you too Keri and family. We love you and thanks for sharing.
About 5 years ago, I had a Dermoid cyst removed from my Right ovary with a bikini cut. I remember when the doctor told me that I had to have surgery, I started crying. It was NOT the news I was expecting to hear. Apparently cysts are actually pretty common. I think it's just one of those things that a lot of people don't talk about. Surgery went better than I thought, and I'm sure recovery will be a lot less than having a baby + having a abdominal incision to heal. Good luck, and I hope it goes well!
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